london to inverness - will I need my passport next time?

I have been working in London this week - at our Camden office - so I have been living the London life of working hard, negotiating the always hot and bothersome tube, strange pub hours and explaining that the SNP is not a Scottish version of the BNP.

I then boarded my train back to Stirling, for a quick sleep and clothes change, before I get picked up for our policy and public affairs road trip to Inverness. All day yesterday I thought three things. Brilliant - some fresh highland air to re-oxygenate the brain. I hope it isn't too cold. And, what kind of mind set shift, if any, do you need to make when moving from one end of the UK to the other.

The first thing is that I will not need to be so conscious of my Scottish words - I used 'driech', 'dwam' and 'smirn' during my three days in London and each time was met with questions about what these words mean. I think 'smirn' is used in the north of England too - although I am not sure - so I am aware that what I think of as Scottish words may be used by Scots but not necessarily owned by them [a bit like banks. I may have an RBS account and use their cash machines but I don't actually have shares in them nor do I feel as a Scot I have responsibility for the global financial business that is the RBS]. I love explaining Scots words and sharing my culture - I also prefer to do it where that sharing is supported with genuine interest and respect. I am not saying it wasn't, but there have been times in the past, with different groups of people, when it feels more like the questioner wants to tease and make fun rather than genuinely understand. Maybe that is my own Scottish cringe though colouring my interpretation.

There is also the cultural approach. It is a generalisation, but in several meetings this week I was conscious of the bluntness, the get-to-the-pointness, that Scots seem to have a wee bit more of than our English cousins. We assume that if we are round a table it is because we all have something to say - so let's say it. I saw Alex Salmond on BBC morning news saying [I paraphrase] 'It isn't difficult to understand devolution - what's the problem?' and poor Bill Turnbull looked quite pale at this direct pointing out that for us devolution isn't a particularly difficult idea to get our heads around and when we find people who don't we will address that head on.

I don't always conform to my national stereotype. I had one colleague point out that my email tone can be overly chatty and doesn't always nail deadlines and what I want from people. I didn't say this to them at the time, but that is in part because I am compensating - evidently over-compensating - for my natural communication style. It also made me wonder if I change that style just a wee bit or quite significantly between my Scotland based and London based colleagues. Needless to say I am now going to just go with my own 'voice' and deal with the response as it comes.

As I wait for the toot of the horn that lets me know my lift is here - and contemplate whether Inverness requires full blown winter gear and therefore me seeking out my wellies and abandoning my carefully selected suede shoe-boots - I feel a distinct lift in my mind that I am going to an event that could redefine how we Scots see ourselves and our nation evolving over the next few years. And I can say 'isn't it dreich?' to other attendees without explaining myself.

women at the top

It is not news that women are still hitting a glass ceiling. What is different is how people define and talk about that glass ceiling. In the Guardian, in the response ot the publication of the Sex and Power survey 2011, I saw an intersting take on it.

Heather McGregor of the 30% Club – a group committed to bringing more women on to corporate boards in the UK and something I support – said "It's not a glass ceiling stopping women from getting to the top, but the fact that they are less likely to build networks, focus on their career priorities, and spend a substantial proportion of their time on their own PR. How will you ever be picked for a good job if no one knows about you?"

And this is where I get a bit annoyed. Women not doing something is not the same thing as saying there is no glass ceiling and it is all their own fault. People often don't do things precisely because there is a glass ceiling - but it is always easier to play the 'if you would only go out and do xx you wouldn't have a problem'.

I take the point that networking and having the contacts is important - but for me the question is why is it that women are not doing this and how do we address that rather than blame women wholesale for it.

My own view is that the reason women don't do this is linked to the patriarchal society we live in. Women are not socialised to 'big up' their work and skills in the same way men are - and we know that this has an impact on their salary as women are less likely to argue for a pay rise or to negotiate at the time of appointment to the same degree men are. It is acceptable for groups of men to range about golf courses on a Friday afternoon as part of their networking or to meet up for drinks or social events where this kind of networking can take place. When women are faced with the majority of the domestic and caring responsibilities popping out for some drinks to network is probably not that viable.

From my own experience my partner is very supportive of this aspect of my career. But I have met with comments from those I am networking with that are not. I have been asked 'where is your husband? and had comments along the lines of 'is your husband ok with you being out without him?'. I often get mistaken for someone's partner rather than the person who they should be networking with. Incredible in this day an age you may think - but it is there. Then there is the view that when women are doing this kind of activity they are 'gossiping' and that it is not seen as work. I have lost count of the times I have been teased for having coffee with contacts as though I only do this to talk about nail polish and the latest Sex and the City box set. Although it seems acceptable from men to talk about non-work related stuff like sports and cars when they network [yes, I know this is generalising].

I was once advised to mug up on football and other sporty ativities so I could hold a conversation in male dominated groups. First, I find it patronising to men to assume that they would not be able to converse with someone who doesn't know every score from last Saturday's games. But I also found it weird that there is no corresponding duty on men to study late into the night about what I am interested in to network with me. The onus is on women to fit in - not on social interactions to be based on the individuals who are there.

There is a final issue. This may just be me, but when I do network I am very aware of my gender on two counts. First, whether I will experience discrimination because I am female and sexual harassament because of my sartorial choices. Second, if it is an evening event I think about my safety. How will I get home? Will I be travelling with a group or on my own? Is it the last train out of Glasgow - in which case you won't see me networking on an evening when there is an Old Firm match that day. As I grow older I feel more comfortable about my clothing choices - after all, assault is wrong no matter what you wear and 'she had a short skirt on' is not a defense. And I have learnt through my own experience and report after report on sexual harassment and sexual assualt that jeans and a hoody do not protect you.

Neither of these issues should hold water in the 21st century - but they do.

If the reason women are not progressing is because they are not networking then a culture where women can't access that is part of a glass ceiling. Yes, there are cracks in the glass but we aren't breathing fresh air yet.